I'm a Rude Hallwalker

After reading a blog post by Amy, a classmate, I have decided to analyze myself as a hallway walker. Her post can be found here: http://amybrowzee.blogspot.com/2012/09/the-hallway-epidemic.html 

I recommend you read that first, otherwise, this post will not make entire sense.

In Amy's post, she classifies four different types of hallway walkers.  “the stoppers”, “the shovers”, “the texters” and "the I’m too cool to walk any faster”people. I am in no way at all criticizing her blog or opinion, but the concept made me laugh. "Breaking News: New type of hallway walker emerges at Kennedy High School."  I’m going to be honest with you and myself. I’m a “shover” and a “texter.” I think I’m a “shover” because I’m a “texter.” Many of my teachers don’t allow phones to be out during their class. It is because of this that the hallways of Kennedy are filled with “texters.” I find myself texting because I a) need money for lunch, b) want to know what’s for lunch, or c) I’m tweeting about something that happened in my last class or “#thingsIhearinthehallway” More likely the latter of the three options. On the rare occasion that I’m not tweeting and I actually am texting, I surely don’t run into people. This is a skill I have mastered, believe me or not. When looking down to text, you must also be aware of what’s ahead of you. For example, I have my head down sending a text message to my mother: “Hi Mom, I don’t feel good. Can you call—“ BAM! Someone walks right in front of me and I run into them. Well, I don’t run into them, but I’m sure you would. Here’s how to avoid that situation. While your head is down, keep your vision focused a bit higher, looking just past the top of your phone. This allows you to see a variety of fashionable, or not so fashionable, foot wear. This footwear is going to be various lengths away from your own footwear. Use your judgement to either stop and let fancy foot Fred pass or swerve around fancy foot Fred. Voila! You avoid a collision with Fred.

I know I said I’m a “shover” but I’m not near as bad as the upperclassmen at Kennedy. If you stop in my path, I’m going to politely say “Excuse me” and smile. If you don’t get the hint, I’ll raise my voice and as a last resort, move you by myself. I’m not big by any means, but I have places to be so move. If you want to get an attitude when I push you, I don’t give a shit. You irritated me when you stopped to say “Hi Babe” to your significant other. As if you two weren’t just texting. C’mon kids, move along. 

Adding onto Amy's hall walkers, there are also "the ninjas." These are the hall walkers that lay low, are probably shorter than the rest of us, and can maneuver through the halls and congested foyer without bothering anyone. They are almost never seen by the average high school hall walker. These are the ones I like. They are my favorite.

(555)